Sunday, 19 August 2018

Love at First Sight?


 Hey Guys,

It has been a while since I last wrote about relationships or dating. Namely, because my love life has been a walking disaster for the past few years. I have officially been single for just over five years, so I am no stranger to the dating game. I have been through a good few experiences; from online dating, to dating guys from work. None of which (for various reasons) have been fruitful...obviously. In this post I want to talk about where I am at now, how my mentality has changed when approaching dating and how I recently discovered that all the cliché advice single people get told, may have some truth to it.
Before we get started, I want to mention zappme, a brand new dating app to hit the market! They are kindly sponsoring this post so keep reading to find out more about them!



"Stop looking for love and love will find you"

This is a piece of advice I have heard a lot from my friends and from strangers. And 99% of the time, it's coming from someone in a relationship! It's very easy to tell someone to stop looking, when you're happily coupled up! But for someone who is single and ready to find a partner, it can be a frustrating piece of advice. 
The age of the Dating App also makes this notion increasingly invalid. Nowadays people are quite literally looking for some form of connection or human interaction in places where 10 or 20 years ago it would never have been found. I think it's still early days to judge or decide the impact this will have on our society, but I do know that the level of patience people now have when looking for love, is severely lowered! 
Now, I am no stranger to online dating, but I would say, that whilst I learnt some valuable life (and love) lessons whilst doing the online thing, I also think that it has made me appreciate connections I form in real life so much more. Possibly because as a teen, riddled with insecurities, I didn't believe I could meet a partner in real life! 
Recent personal experiences (which I hope to write more about soon) have proven that the initial statement about looking for 'love' has been true for me. I recently met someone who came quite literally out of the blue and surprised me...


"Love at first sight"

...The universe took over my life for a while, aligning stars and what not, as I navigated the feelings I was experiencing for someone who was practically a stranger to me, though felt like someone I had known for years and years. This feeling, though scary, is extremely beautiful. Not only because I had a reminder that my heart is not a block of ice, but that I am still able to experience something so overwhelming and passionate, as if I was in a rom-com. This moment of time is something I have always hoped for (I am a true romantic at heart) but I didn't believe would ever happen to me. Bridget Jones, yes, but not me! 
Bringing myself down from the pink, fluffy cloud is hard. Because it is easy to get caught up in the fireworks exploding in my stomach and the smile this person brings to my face. 
Now, I'm a strong, independent, 26 year old woman. I want to take my time, to enjoy every moment and make sure I don't lose any part of myself along the way, like my 21 year-old counterpart. Through the past five years of dating, the lessons I have taken with me include staying true to myself, keeping my independent edge whilst allowing someone else into my life, to enjoy trusting someone, being confident (though I still have off days) and most of all to not compare myself to others.

So yeah... I guess you could say that is where I'm at right now. I am happy exploring this new, beautiful territory. Treading carefully and living life as best I can. 



zappme

As promised, here is a little more about brand new dating app zappme!

zappme is “the dating app with a difference”. You use the app to initiate conversation or interaction with people in your immediate proximity. If you see someone you fancy in a bar, for example, you open zappme and see if the person also uses the app. If they do, you will be able to “zapp” them. They then can accept or ignore your zapp. Following this you can exchange instant messages.

The app is supposed to be spontaneous and fun, but consent and safeguarding are of course also a priority. 

I think zappme bridges the gap between the old school days of meeting people in real life and the modern days of online dating apps. Which is a beautiful compromise!

I hope you enjoyed this post. What are your thoughts on dating in the modern world? Do you believe in love at first sight? Or do you online date?



Eb x

All images by Justina Naravaite